Taking the kids to visit the family from Thurs-Mon. in NY. I'm in Virginia and see my family 4-5 times a year, probably. I would really like to talk to my sister about all this. She knows that I've had gender issues before, but I suspect she thinks they are in the past. But, I really don't know. I want to confide in her, but I'm not really sure exactly what I would confide, since I really haven't figured anything out. I don't know how she'd react. I mentioned something to her along these lines about 10 years ago, and her response was that she didn't know if her husband could or would want to see me "like that." But, things change over 10 years' time... you never know. I've also mentioned stuff like this to my Mom and Dad, also about 10 years ago. Mom's response was that she didn't know if she could see me like that, and Dad's was that I'd still be his child, and that he'd still love me. 1 out of 3 isn't bad, I guess.

I guess.

I wonder if they will perceive that I act any differently. One of my female friends, who knows, said she's noticed more feminine hand gestures, etc., lately with me. Well, whether or not I do talk to my sister about it, this will be on my mind all weekend. Being with family... wondering what it would be like, or how many of them would still want to be around me... if I did decide to transition.

I think that every time I go up there now, I'm going to think, "this could be the last non-fucked up visit I have with my family."

Well, I am going up at Xmas, and I wouldn't come out to them then, so many this could be the penultimate non-fucked up visit. :)

2 comments:

Where in NY? I am from the Buffalo/Rochester area...

Born and raised in Albany. Was in Syracuse for grad school. Felt like home a few weeks back when we got that 25" of snow! :)

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