accept. embrace. live.

Did you ever spend lots of time thinking about something, chasing dead-end after dead-end in your mind, only to have the answer smack you right in the face? I'm talking a good, solid *SMACK!!* here. So obvious that you're incredulous that you hadn't thought of it before? I had such a moment this morning.

I've been trying to think of ways to get out and meet people. Get my life restarted. Somewhere I'd be comfortable, engaged, interested, etc. I talked about the volunteering thing and while appealing, I don't think I'll meet too many people stocking shelves at the library, volunteering to pick weeds at the local horticultural garden, or delivering food via Meals on Wheels. I looked at local meetups online and most of them are 20-something moms. Not quite in my comfort zone. There's always triathlon, but I wouldn't be able to seriously get into that until well after surgery, and even then, it requires a level of dedication that I'm not certain that I possess anymore.

This morning in the car, I was listening music by this Norwegian group called Secret Garden. Instrumental, peaceful. One of the pieces featured uilleann pipes. I love the uilleann pipes. So mournful, so moving. I was thinking how it'd be cool to play the pipes. The pipes were accompanied by a violinist. Years ago, I had purchased Secret Garden's violin sheet music and used to play along with.....

Oh!!!

I've played the violin on and off since 3rd grade. And I was good, too. In high school, I was the concertmaster of the orchestra, played in a bunch of "all-star" orchestras, was a member of the Syracuse University orchestra, in the 1st violin section alongside a bunch of music majors. As an adult, I played in an orchestra which had the honor of accompanying Placido Domingo for a concert. It's a pretty amazing feeling to play while one of the Three Tenors is singing five feet away from you. Hard to pay attention to what you're supposed to be playing, in fact. I also played a few Irish jigs at my sister's wedding reception. Most of my family hadn't heard me play before, and they were blown away.

I always loved expressing myself through violin, the people I met through it, the music itself. I always enjoyed being part of a performance ensemble, whether it be an 100-piece symphony orchestra, or a 4-member string quartet. And it's a group of people that share a common interest, intelligent people, people that I've always been able to relate to, people with whom you share a certain camaraderie. Practicing at home will keep me doing something healthy while keeping me off the stupid internet. Something I love, that's rewarding, and will set a good example for my kids.

My violin has been sitting in its' case for three or four years. It has a giant crack in the back of it. :| I'm not sure that it's salvageable. Oh well, I can always get another instrument. There are a few local community orchestras around here. So my plan is to get practicing and audition. It's been a few years, so I'll be rusty for a bit. But playing the violin has always been like riding a bike. Hopefully it will be a good outlet for me, as it's been in the past.

How could I not have thought of this before?