When I was in high school and college and it came time to study for an exam, I always got to a point where I said to myself, "you know what?  I know this stuff.  Looking at these materials for another minute isn't going to help.  I'm done.  I'm ready.  Bring it on."  I've spent countless hours reading blogs, reading sample coming-out letters, letters to family, to coworkers, to friends, to children.  Reading about the effects of hormones, reading about the real-life ramifications about being transsexual.  Countless hours thinking about it, rehearsing conversations with people, visualizing my life as a successful woman.  All towards making my decision.  Now that I've made my decision, bring it on.

Now am thinking about timelines for telling people.  Lately it really bothers me when I am around my friends.  Whereas in the past, I've unknowlingly acted; put up this facade around them, now I am aware that I am acting.  And I don't like it.  I'm working on a letter that I plan to send to 30 or so of my friends shortly after I start hormones.  I am excited to send it.  To be certain, there will be some negative reaction, but I will be able to be authentic around my friends.  Once I've told my friends, then it will be time to turn to family.  Then STBX and kids.  Lastly, work, but not until I am very very close to going full-time, like, when going full-time is imminent.

At first I wondered, since I won't be going full-time for well over a year, if it is too soon to tell people.  I don't think so.  I think this will give people a chance to react, adapt, and hopefully accept.  And this amount of time will help "usher in" the real me, gradually.  I think people have a better chance of accepting if they see incremental changes over a period of time.  And also, I won't have to spend the next year-and-a-half making excuses for why my hair is longer, why I am wearing this or that, why my nails are painted, and what are those things under my shirt?

This is going to be good.  There will be some hard times ahead.  But I am confident that it's going to be good.


Good for you girl! I know how you feel too. I was sooo ready to tell everyone and it felt really good to finally be able to be real with most everybody in my life. Yes there were definitely negative reactions but there were also lots of positive reactions. =)

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When I transitioned, there just weren't too many blogs out there written by straight, transitioned women. Well, here's one.

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